Hi, I’m İlkyaz (or Summer).
And if you’re here, maybe you’re also searching — for strength, for clarity, or just for someone who understands.
I’m not a doctor, not a therapist, not an expert. I’m a human being who lost her balance — literally. In 2023, my life took a sudden, unexplainable turn. I was hospitalized with a high fever, and within days, I lost my ability to walk, speak clearly, and coordinate even the smallest movements. My brain and body stopped working the way they used to.
After years of stability, and nearly a decade on lithium treatment, I was suddenly faced with a neurological collapse no one could quite explain. A shadow on my cerebellum, they said. Then it vanished. But the damage stayed. I was left with ataxia. With tremor. With confusion. And with a long road ahead.
That road has been full of heartbreak, hope, setbacks, and small triumphs. There were days I couldn’t say simple words. Days I sat on the floor, trying to remember how to stand. But through it all, I kept walking — sometimes wobbly, always determined.
Early in my healing, I came across a Stoic reflection that stayed with me:
“We should reflect on what it would feel like to lose the ability to speak, to walk, to breathe, to swallow—or to lose our freedom altogether.”
These words didn’t frighten me. They reminded me to be present. To appreciate the subtle, sacred acts of living. They gave my suffering context — and my healing, direction.
So I started collecting the things that helped:
Books that soothed my mind.
Supplements that supported my brain.
Exercises that retrained my muscles.
Songs that gave me strength when I felt empty.
Breathwork, therapy, mindfulness, meditation, connection, stillness… and a deep hunger to heal.
Orange Healing was born from all of this. It’s my notebook, my archive, and my offering — a space where I share the things that supported me in the hope that they might support you too. Whether you’re dealing with ataxia, a neurological diagnosis, or just the invisible weight of life, I want you to know you’re not alone.
This blog isn’t about perfection. It’s about progress.
It’s not about fixing everything. It’s about finding meaning — even in the mess.
It’s about building resilience, one moment at a time.
You don’t need to have a diagnosis to feel lost.
And you don’t need to have all the answers to start healing.
If you find even one sentence here that makes you feel less alone, then this space has done its job.
Welcome to Orange Healing.
With all my heart — I’m glad you’re here.
